How to Cope with a Loved One in Jail

Separation from an incarcerated loved one can be difficult and overwhelming, as maintaining connections with others is critical to protecting mental and emotional health. Adding to the challenge is the range of emotions — such as isolation, betrayal, grief, or anger — you may be feeling with regard to their incarceration.

Learning how to cope with a loved one in jail will go a long way in positively impacting your mental health, despite the challenges staying in touch may present. 

Processing How to Cope With a Loved One in Jail

You are likely often focused on your loved one who is incarcerated and their situation, but it’s important to consider and think about how you feel. Concerns you may be grappling with include:

• How your loved one’s incarceration will affect themselves, you, or even your whole family or friends’  outlook

• How severe the crime your loved one committed was and whether you can get past it (this can be especially difficult if there was a victim)

• How your day-to-day living has been impacted

• Regardless of your concerns or emotions, acknowledging your feelings and taking care of yourself is critical to your path forward. When you are worried about others, it can be easy to overlook your own needs. But remember, if you’re not of sound mind and being, it makes it harder for you to offer support — emotional or otherwise — to others, including your loved one who is incarcerated.

Looking After Yourself can Sometimes be Tricky

Reduce stress and anxiety by taking some time to participate in activities that bring you joy. Even if it’s hard, you should still try. You may be surprised at how beneficial a little timeout is to your mental well-being. This doesn’t need to be a large commitment or an expensive undertaking. Write out a gratitude list, take a bubble bath, go for a day hike in a local or state park. Another option is joining a support group — even if it’s an online discussion thread.

Another key part of learning how to cope with a loved one in jail is to distance yourself from others who add noise and toxicity to your life. Whether it’s that uncle you never get along with or a rude neighbor up the street who’s always in your business, don’t feed into their negativity or subjectivity. You can ignore their criticisms of you, and your incarcerated loved one. Remember: you owe no one an explanation, including that uncle or neighbor, for what’s happened.

Communication is Key

Self-care is always critical and so is admitting to yourself how you feel. Not comfortable sharing with others you trust just yet? That’s fine. In that case, perhaps it would be a good idea to keep a journal or diary, someplace to document your thoughts that are safe and private. You can always open up and share with others if you feel ready later. The important thing is you are able to process and articulate your thoughts and emotions in healthy ways so they don’t stay bottled up inside your mind.

Maybe you have already forgiven your incarcerated friend or loved one. Or perhaps you don’t intend to forgive them, or you just aren’t sure how your relationship will move forward. Regardless, it’s good to keep an open mind and continue communicating. If you want to move forward, and help guide your loved one through their sentence, staying connected will help you both.

HomeWAV Helps Keep You Connected

Remember, by looking after yourself, you are better enabled to help your incarcerated loved one through their difficult ordeal. 

If you are ready to make communication part of your process for how to cope with a loved one in jail, HomeWAV provides families and friends with easy solutions to stay connected. In just a couple of moments, you can create your own account and download our free app. If you’re searching for more information about HomeWAV, view our frequently asked questions and details about setting up an account.